Thursday, February 25, 2010


Up until January 8th of this year, I was just Laura. I had many roles: wife, daughter, stepmom, employee, etc., but my name was, Laura. On my husband's and Elvis's birthday, after 4 days of attempted labor induction and one c-section, that all changed and I took on a new name, Mommy. My daughter, Caroline, came into the world and everything that I was became secondary to what I was now. I was now a mother, that most revered role, the embodiment of femininity and all that jazz. I loved my baby instantly but I also felt an instant panic (well, after all those fantastic pain medications wore off) and realized that my life would absolutely never be the same. Oh, of course, I knew that would be the case beforehand but reality really hit home right then. No more spontaneity, no more naps, long baths, full night’s sleep, whenever sex- it wasn't the responsibility of this new life that terrified me, it was the loss of the life I knew.

I made a vow then that I would try to remain Laura while becoming Mommy. I want to prioritize my relationship with my husband. I want to maintain (regain) my appearance. I want to advance my career. I want to hang out with my girlfriends (who luckily almost all have young babies, so not too much of a challenge). I want to do all of that but I also want to be a mommy. I want to talk about my baby…a LOT. I want to spend evenings cuddling with her. I want to plaster my office with her picture and do everything in my power to make her life the best that it can be. One way to do that is by setting a good example for her. What kind of role model am I if I lose myself when I would never want that for her.

So this blog is my way of being accountable to not letting that happen. Oh there will be plenty of posts, bragging and pictures focusing on my baby, I’m only human but I hope to discuss more the ways I’m balancing my dueling identities.

Of course to indulge my Mommy side, a picture of my sweetie, Caroline Noelle and my first baby, my kitty, Sara.